#im lonely i need things to do

[cl4nn-k1ll3rr]

Out of rp for a second, I'm okay with being tagged! If you see something or make a post, tag me in it if you want itachi to respond ^^

[artsymeeshee]

one of those nights

[lastchr1stmas]

I wanna smoke cigarettes and do drugs so so bad BUT I CANT

[pimento-playing-hopscotch]

I love this show and it means a lot to me,

and I feel disappointed and a little bit misled tbh by the choices they have made-

These are two thoughts that can coexist btw

[what-even-is-sleep]

thinking about Bodkin again bc I mean,,, ALL THE SYMBOLISM OHHHHHGH. i NEED some tumblr film analysis hobbyists to watch this show and tell me all the themes n such

[watery-melon-baller]

I wish I had some expired NyQuil so i could take it and get mildly high during my 3 hour class instead of being bored out of my mind as it takes the entire class period for all 15 students to present their projects

[spr1ng]

i feel so at peace but at the same time so chaotic and drained

[puppyeared]

if escape rooms as team building exercises became popular im not sure if id be more excited or terrified

[jojo-the-puppy]

i think im officially done trying to keep in touch with people who dont try ever

[folkloregirlfriend]

i hate feeling ambitionless aimless the future is so bleak

[felicitywilds]

also slowly turning around in my brain how rose said she was going to stay with the doctor forever, and then later donna says the same thing (to martha!! the doctor doesnt even hear or know!!! it would make him so happy but hurt him so much if he did!!!!!!), and then when she tells the doctor shes going home in sontaran stratagem he immediately assumes it means shes leaving him for good and accepts it but also launches into all the things he still wanted to show her.

and i know its played for a joke like haha silly martian thats not what i meant! but this is the same man who, when he needed to turn human, loved someone SO DEEP AND HARD that he didnt think he'd ever fall in love again. ever. even with his memory erased. so when you take that moment of "oh you're just popping home for a visit" and like ACTUALLY look at it you're like. this man gets so so so attached to people, and is so incredibly scarred by losing these people he loves that he has no choice but to let them go when they want to leave on good terms, because he knows how bad it could get for them if they stay, no matter how much he wants them to stay.

anyway donna's forever and rose's forever are just different flavors of the same "i need you as much as you need me, so im in it for the long haul, bad stuff included" and its chefs kiss

[professionaljester]

love my bad mental health, love being suicidal all the time

[mathsbian]

God I need friends…

[dreadfutures]

.

I love Solas, and I love Solavellan, because I find the character and story so compelling, but sometimes I feel like a fake Solavellan

to me Ixchel and Solas has kind of always been about two friends who both suffer from the same affliction and they are the only two people who can ever understand it, the affliction being outside (duty, responsibility, guilt) and inside (inherent fatalism in philosophy, viewing the self as unworthy, haunted by despair) and though

they can't at first forgive themselves or find the strength within them to stay out of their dark spirals, they can do it for the other. and how important that is. that's love. the smooching and everything is on top. the knowing what dark predators haunt the other person's psyche and saying I'll be there with you when the wolves come, we'll survive together. the I know exactly who you are and how ugly it is and I love you for it and I see the beauty still. the I will never get tired of you even if youre never "fixed." that's love right. that's Ixchel and Solas to me.

so like yeah they have been Together for about like 170+ chapters. they're not being tested about being pulled apart by duty or fear anymore, they're testing the strength of that bond in those dark ugly moments that come for us all. and mostly theyre good. mostly they're just on an adventure together.

somehow it feels like I'm a fake Solavellan 🥲 like early dpdf captured something and... getting together, having truths revealed, this *aftermath* is like I left that behind somehow. like it's beyond what Solavellans want. idk. I think about other fics that are post- truth coming out and staying together and they're very different vibes, I think, you know?

I like my action/adventure fic, I like them together, I like having moments where they find that there is still a dark corner they haven't swept out into the light yet and the way it's still scary for someone to want to know those ugly parts of you that they maybe haven't seen yet. I like having them be mostly utterly confident in each others competency. I like them united against the unknown together. but like did everything about them peak in Here Lies the Abyss, you know? or maybe Wycome? I'm so nervous about everything in TBG :'( it's just hard for me RN in my heart idk to feel confident of like. where it Fits into fandom besides "blue loves lore and wants to explore metaphysics with Ixchel (new perspective) and Solas (wise, experienced guide)"

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[transzilla]

On gender like ive always felt a little envious of trans men who transition and they find contentment in just being male, like their ambition kinda stops there like yeah I'm just some guy i love twitch streaming and jacking off. Like I'm a guy, time to stop thinking abt it. Me I'm never gonna be satisfied. like being male as default I'm still going to be a little uncomfortable and dysphoric, like I need my masculinity to be a presence, not an absence, less like a dad and more like a demon. A dark presence that needs to be appeased and endlessly exploits desire and is constantly in pursuit, either of a discernable target or in an aimless frantic search for any scent that might correct its path. People afraid to look at me like i'm the devil.

[calamitys-child]

I'm being so serious rn if I ever talk about doing another fringe festival run in the next like 3 years at least send me to fucking therapy. It is a cry for help. This is bad for me.